I think, all in all, the real key to finding motivation and meaning everyday is by taking advantage of each day to just live and be, without expecting anything from yourself or from anyone else. This doesn’t mean Nihilism, it means mindfulness.
One of the things that keeps my motivation and meaning sustained is looking at the bigger picture.
I know it’s pretty stupid, but I find myself looking at my whole life and just saying, “Okay, I have the rest of my life to go, I’m only halfway through (hopefully). I have a bunch of time ahead of me. There are a lot of things I want to do. I want to write, I want to play music, I want to travel, I want to read, I want to be with my children and family… So I’m gonna go out and live my life. I’m gonna try to be a positive influence on others, to contribute, and to make a difference.” Worst case, I’ll fake it until I make it.
I think it’s really important to do that. You need to believe that you have the potential to do and be great things, even if you’ve already given up… and even if you’re not doing great things right now.
Growth
This is something I struggle with. I want to live up to my potential. I want to be that person who doesn’t stop living. Yet, I don’t want to live a life of unfulfilled expectations either. It makes me seem negative to be honest.
I’m just another person trying to carve a life out for myself, living a simple, but fulfilled, life. Hopefully I’m not fooling myself, but I think this is what I see myself ultimately doing. The devil’s in the details though.
I feel like my motivation and meaning are constantly going on and off like a light switch, and I never know what I’ll walk into. So I keep thinking “Well, I’ll just hit the switch when I need to,” but the switch is never the right direction and I fumble.
It’s hard to stay motivated in this day and age. What do you do to find meaning in the meaningless There are multiple reasons to live, and we need to find them. I tend to use music as my go-to source for happiness. I may not be good, but at least I feel alive.
I tend to believe that life is not always as it seems but often appears so because we do not understand it. If life is not as it appears, what is it really? Is there a meaning to it all?
Is it found in the works of Plato or Thomas Aquinas, or in the throes of one’s own spiritual or religious revelation, or can it be found just by experiencing the beauty of life, the music of the spheres, the joy in those who care about me, or something so mundane as when I smile in the morning or laugh at a friend’s joke? I don’t know, but I’m trying to find out.
Empathy
You are not alone in this. It’s not easy to stay emotionally healthy in stressful environments, and sometimes it’s just really, really hard to even just stay afloat.
Stress is as much intrinsic to us as it is our enemy; it’s part of the human condition. We don’t usually need to keep our emotions in check when things are going well, but when we get distressed or when things go wrong it’s important to be able to cope.
The things that stress us out are not always obvious, and sometimes there aren’t any good solutions. All the things that stress us out can range from personal to universal. I try to figure out what is specific to me and what is part of the human condition when addressing stress.
Remind yourself that you are a strong person with a big heart (or could be if you wanted). You want to help others and have gratitude for life. Life can suck, but it’s yours to live.
Remember, everything you need to have a happy life is already given to you, and all you have to do is keep growing and improving. A happy life is possible, but it’s impossible to live without unhappiness being a part of your life.
Acceptance
Happiness seems like a simple concept, but there’s so much to it. I know it’s hard to just say you’re going to be happy. It isn’t really that easy. I think a lot of us struggle with the idea of happiness because we never expect to be happy forever. We hope to always be happy, but we’re realistic knowing that nothing will stay the same forever. The idealism outpaces reality which fatigues us.
I like the idea of a happy life (even if it’s a rocky way forward), and I think there is a path to such a life, but it can be very hard to figure out what works. The quest for it can put you at odds with your own brain and neurochemistry. I would say that happiness should come from within, but often it doesn’t. Sometimes that next gift to yourself hits the right receptors to make your life better.
Happiness comes and goes, and we have to be proactive to stay happy. The path to a happy life is about becoming more aware of yourself and what makes you happy. Sometimes it all comes from within and where we’re going, other times we need a little help to get over the hills.
Introspection
We’re aware of where our strengths and weaknesses lie. We can easily recognize what we don’t like, but it’s harder to recognize what we actually like.
Sometimes it’s obvious, and maybe it feels like it to those who don’t go looking for answers. But, you still have to ask the right questions to find out. There is no such thing as an external self-fulfilling prophecy — if you say you will do X, and don’t do X, then we’re not to blame when X does not come to fruition. We’re responsible for our actions, and our behaviors.
If you want to make something happen, you can’t expect it to happen; you need to make it happen. There has to be motivation from within. I want to write a book but I just haven’t; that statement is as freeing as it is damnation.
I am the source of my own failure, whether intentional or not.
Refinement
When we are motivated from within, we feel better and happier. When some external motivation comes along that we need to achieve something, it seems to make things happen. There is a fine line between what should be self-motivated and what should be motivated from the outside. You can often be too much of a perfectionist.
You might decide, for example, that you need to work towards a six-pack abs, and get a trainer and go to the gym. But the reality is that you are not going to feel confident in what you’re doing once you step on the machine. We all get scared in the gym and think, “I’ve never done this before, and I’m not sure of myself.”
We all go into something a bit insecure. The way to overcome that insecurity is to go for it. Instead of worrying about whether something is wrong or right, let’s go for the best effort, and try our best. I know I’ve sucked at everything I’ve ever done, but I also haven’t at some of the things I’ve done.
If you want to achieve something, you have to realize that your attitude can make it happen. The better attitude you have, the more things will happen, and the faster things will happen.
Conclusion
The way we view a situation affects the way we will approach it. When we have a negative view, we will tend to be negative and pessimistic about that situation. We will feel insecure because our view is negative. But when we have a positive view about a situation, we are able to be more optimistic.
Optimists have a positive view, which brings us more hope and faith. They see it more like a challenge than a limitation. When we see something as a challenge, we think it is possible to accomplish. We think that by just trying our best, we can reach our goals. How are you going to reach your goals?
You have to understand that if we don’t do anything, nothing changes. We have to act. We have to do something.
It’s like the way you prepare a party. If you have a party with no amenities, it would be boring. So, you have to prepare. You need to act. You need to take steps. It’s on you to do things to make your life happen.
Your attitude is your perception of a situation. How you look at a situation will make a difference with how that situation will affect you. What’s going on inside of us cannot be seen externally. If something is going on internally that is positive and hopeful and that will have a positive outcome, the external must reflect that. You can’t control everything, but you can control yourself. Who do you want to be?
Image by M. Maggs from Pixabay